Can I tell you something?

Dear **** (You know who you are!)

I just wanted to write to you and tell you exactly what I want to say.

You. Are. A. Wonderful. Person.

If anything has broken my heart the most, it's the suffering that you've had to face. Suffering that was done to you and the things that you have done to yourself.

You.

Deserve.

So.

Much.

Better.

Look at your body.

Look at it for what it is.

An amazing thing, heart pumping, blood in veins, lungs filled and emptied.

You weren't an accident, you weren't a mistake.

The things you hate about you

desperately

deserve

to

be

loved.

YOU

deserve to be loved.

You are smart.

You are funny.

You are inspiring.

You are loved, dearly and completely.

I know most people don't want to hear Jesus talk but can I tell you something?

Jesus is real. He didn't do the hurt to you. I don't know why he's let you suffer so long and I pray for you so much that Jesus would free you from the weight you feel on your heart and the hurts that are suffocating out your joy. You don't deserve it. At all.

I can't answer for God as to why he hasn't just rescued you right out of what you're dealing with, the hurt, the lack, the damage.

But I want you to know something that He reminds me of every day, especially when I think of you and how special you are.

He made every beautiful thing I see in you.

Your nurturing spirit, your encouragement, your compassion. Your care for the underdog, your appreciation of the things that other people overlook. Your creativity, your talent, your gift for creating beautiful things out of materials that probably would have been thrown away.

You know what you are?

You're a rescuer, a rehabilitator.

I want you to know that Jesus didn't cause your pain. If you're mad at him, it's okay - he can take it and he's not scared away by the questions you have of him.

I want you so badly to see that He's real and that He loves you.

All the amazing things you are are a reflection of Him and His beauty. You may not see it the same way I see it. You may not see God as compassionate and loving. But I hope someday that you do see it. That you do feel his love like warm tea filling your belly. Like the bed and blankets that hold you when you're scared or sad or lonely or panicked. Like the music that calms you.

The blades that make the panic pass or the binges that feed that emptiness will

never.

truly.

love.

you.

They don't serve you, they hurt you.

They don't fill you, they empty you.

They don't soothe you, they.

are.

ruining.

you.

I wish with every part of me that I could take these things away from you, to protect you from them, to rid you of them and make you free.

Know that I love you.

Know that Jesus Chris is real and he loves you.

Know that I'll love you even if it takes you some time to realize the truth about Jesus.

Not for me, not for anyone else. But I hope that you do feel his love today and know that when you suffer, he suffers too.

I'm sorry if any of this sounds cheesy but please know that I love you dearly. You are and will always be one of the most important people in my book. When you hurt, I hurt too.

Love you

Rachel